


After the End

by Adrianna99



Category: Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime)
Genre: Domestic Fluff, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Post-Canon
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-06
Updated: 2018-03-06
Packaged: 2019-03-27 18:25:15
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,077
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13886538
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Adrianna99/pseuds/Adrianna99
Summary: Viktor choked back a sob and blurted, “I dreamed that you left me.  In Barcelona, you left me after the short program, after you said you wanted to end things, and I watched you go and I couldn’t do anything-”Yuuri’s lips trembled.  “Oh, Vitya,” he said and pulled Viktor close again, burying his face in Viktor’s hair.  “I am so, so sorry.”[In which Yuuri isn't the only one with insecurities]





	After the End

**Author's Note:**

> Has this been done? Probably. 
> 
> Beta'd by the lovely [Ollie](https://postingpebbles.tumblr.com/) and the amazing [Emma](https://and-then-yoi-happened.tumblr.com/)!
> 
> Enjoy!
> 
> Disclaimer: I own nothing.

“After the Final, let’s end this.”

Viktor blinked in utter shock at his boyfriend (no, fiancé, they were fiancés since Yuuri had proposed to him), who sat across from him in their hotel room the night before the Grand Prix Final free skate, his face blank and impassive.

“What?” Viktor managed to croak, feeling like the air had been knocked from his lungs. Freezing droplets from his still-wet hair trickled down his back, and the damp towel around his neck did nothing to stop them.

Yuuri was still studying him with that awful, indifferent expression, then repeated calmly, “After the Final, let’s end this.”

Viktor doubled over, suddenly feeling physically ill, as his entire world shattered around him. “End… this?” he stammered, tongue far too dry and heavy for his mouth, ears ringing.

Yuuri cocked his head slightly, looking like an adorable, confused puppy even as he destroyed Viktor with every word that left his mouth.  

“Viktor, there’s no use in pretending anymore,” he said.  “You said that this… this _arrangement_ between us was just until the Final, which ends tomorrow.  There’s no use in pretending that being together romantically would work beyond then.  So let’s end it.”

Viktor swallowed hard, opened and closed his mouth several times, but no words would come out.  His vision blurred, but he barely registered the tears rolling down his face and dripping from his nose as he reached out for Yuuri.  He needed to touch Yuuri, hold him, convince him to stay—

Yuuri quickly shifted back, moving out of Viktor’s desperate reach, and frowned at his shaking hands clutching pitifully at the bedspread by Yuuri’s feet.

“I don’t understand why you’re reacting like this,” he said with a little jerk of his chin at Viktor’s tears. Viktor’s body bent almost in half like he was begging for his life.

And in a way he was. Yuuri had become the most important person in his life, one of his reasons to get up in the morning, his light and love—and now he was leaving. He wanted to leave Viktor all alone with no one but the darkness to hear his pain, and his pillow to muffle his sobs—

“Isn’t this what you wanted?” Yuuri said, sliding off the bed, voice cold and firm.  “Isn’t it, Viktor?” He moved across the room, gathering his belongings, slipping on his shoes, shrugging his coat over his shoulders.  

“Viktor?”

Yuuri’s back faced him as he stood in front of the door with one hand on the knob, his face shadowed in the dim light of the hotel room. Only a few minutes ago they had been laughing, smiling—and now everything was falling apart. Yuuri was unmoving, staring at the ground, but Viktor could still read the clear resolve in his frame. After months together Viktor had become fluent in the language of Yuuri, and now he could tell that every fiber of Yuuri’s being didn’t want to be with him anymore.

He could hardly bear to be in Viktor’s presence.

“Viktor?”

Viktor was frozen where he was, face wet with tears and dripping with snot, knees pressed uncomfortably to the cold wooden floor of the hotel room, and the fingers of one hand still gripping the bedspread like it was the only thing keeping him upright. The other was outstretched in Yuuri’s direction. His mouth was open—maybe to scream in agony, to cry and wail, to beg Yuuri to stay with him, to yell at him for being so horribly, awfully, painfully _selfish_ —but no sound could get past his lips.

Then Yuuri turned back for a moment, his glasses opaque in the glare of the dimmed lamp beside the bed, and then nodded before opening the door. Viktor stumbled to his feet, unsteady and trembling, but before he could reach his fiancé and convince him to stay even for another moment, Yuuri stepped out without looking back.

And at the sound of the door shutting behind him, Viktor dropped like a puppet whose strings had been cut, a broken whimper welling up as he felt his heart shatter. A sick, empty void opened in his chest as he curled into himself and sobbed, trying to figure out where he had gone wrong, what he could have done to keep Yuuri close, why the golden band on his ring finger didn’t mean anything anymore—

“Viktor? Viktor? Vitya? Vitya, please!”

Viktor sobbed, eyes squeezed shut as he rocked back and forth, and he was rocking back and forth, and _someone_ was rocking him back and forth, his face buried in a warm, firm, familiar chest.

“Yuuri, Yuuri,” Viktor gasped, tears dripping into his mouth as he clung tightly to the man holding him, trembling like a leaf.

“Shh, Vitya, I’m here, you’re alright,” Yuuri murmured, one arm around Viktor’s back and the other cupped around the back of his head, tangled in his hair.  “You’re alright. I’m here.”

“Yuuri,” Viktor whispered, his voice breaking as he dug his fingers into Yuuri’s arms, not letting him go for one second.  Yuuri was here, Yuuri hadn’t left, Yuuri hadn’t left him yet, Yuuri was still _here_.

Yuuri rubbed gentle circles into the space between Viktor’s shoulder blades, murmuring something in Japanese too quiet for Viktor to make out, and played with Viktor’s hair as Viktor cried into his chest. The broken sobs subsided into small sniffles after a long while, and Viktor felt Yuuri pull him a little closer before saying, “Vitya, sweetheart, do you want to talk about it?”

Viktor kept his face hidden against the soft fabric of Yuuri’s sleep shirt and inhaled deeply, taking solace in the familiar smell of cheap detergent, Yuuri’s shampoo, damp poodle fur, and the teriyaki they had eaten for dinner that night as they watched a movie.

“Viten’ka?” Yuuri whispered, still carding his fingers through Viktor’s hair.

Viktor took one last deep breath, then shifted up until he and Yuuri were face to face. Viktor was sure he looked awful; despite what Yuuri said he knew he wasn’t a pretty crier, and his face was probably blotchy and flushed. But somehow, Yuuri gazed at him with nothing but love and adoration in his eyes.

Viktor took a small, shaky breath, and then whispered, “I just had a nightmare, that’s all. I’m sorry for waking you.”

Yuuri tenderly brushed Viktor’s fringe out of his eyes and pressed a kiss to his forehead.  “Never apologize,” he said softly. “I love you when you’re sad just as much as I love you when you’re happy. I want to be here if you need me.”

At that, Viktor choked back a sob and blurted, “I dreamed that you left me. In Barcelona, you left me after the short program, after you said you wanted to end things, and I watched you go and I couldn’t do anything—”

Yuuri’s lips trembled. “Oh, Vitya,” he said, pulling Viktor close again and burying his face in Viktor’s hair. “I am so, so sorry.” He leaned away for a moment, looking Viktor in the eye. “This is my fault. You know… you know I would never leave you, right?” He brought Viktor’s right hand up to his mouth, pressing his lips to the warm gold of Viktor’s wedding ring.

“I know,” Viktor whispered. “I know.  But I… get scared. I don’t… I don’t know what I would do without you, I—” He cut himself off and exhaled slowly, breath unsteady.

Yuuri cupped Viktor’s face in both hands, staring deep into his eyes. “Viten’ka,” Yuuri said fiercely, gaze unwavering. “You are my husband, my soulmate, and the love of my life.  I am not going to leave you, and I wish I could go back and fix the mistakes I made in Barcelona so you won’t have any reason to doubt my love for you. I love you so, _so_ much, and I’m so lucky to be able to spend the rest of my life with you. That is _never_ going to change.”

Viktor sniffled as tears welled in his eyes again, this time overwhelmed with love for his Yuuri. Yuuri smiled a little, his eyes wet, and with one thumb brushed a tear off Viktor’s cheek. “What do you want me to do?” he whispered.

Viktor tried to smile back, lips trembling.  “Just stay close to me.”

Yuuri leaned in, kissing off a tear near Viktor’s mouth before trailing gentle kisses across both cheeks, where freckles would appear in the summer, and then down his hairline and across the line of his jaw. Viktor giggled in spite of himself when Yuuri kissed the ticklish spot beneath his ear, and smiled when Yuuri ended by softly kissing him on the lips. He sighed happily against Yuuri and kissed his husband tenderly for a few minutes before Yuuri gently broke the contact with a small tug on Viktor’s lower lip.

“I’ll be right back, OK?” he said, propping himself up on one elbow and staring lovingly down at Viktor.

Viktor nodded, taking Yuuri’s hand and kissing his ring.  “OK.”

Yuuri carefully slipped out of bed and crossed the room, smiling when Makkachin padded in as soon as he opened the door. Viktor lured Makkachin to the bed with a few pats on the sheets beside him and a few kissy noises, and cuddled his poodle as Yuuri left. A moment later the light in the kitchen flicked on and Viktor could hear Yuuri puttering around, filling the kettle with water and doing something in the cupboards.

In a bit he returned and sat on the bed next to Viktor, a damp cloth in his hand. “Shh,” Yuuri whispered when Viktor tried to protest being pampered, gently wiping at the dried tear tracks on Viktor’s cheeks. “Let me take care of you.”

Viktor laid back and let Yuuri use the cloth to carefully clean his face with smooth, gentle strokes, and happily accepted a few more tender kisses on his forehead, down the bridge of his nose, to his lips.  “A little better?” Yuuri asked, and Viktor nodded silently, fingers curled in the fur of the drowsy poodle next to him.

Yuuri planted one last kiss on the place where his hair definitely wasn’t thinning before getting up again with a small groan, returning to the kitchen. This time, it was a few minutes longer until the kitchen light went dark and Yuuri came back with two steaming mugs of tea.

He gently closed the door with his foot and settled himself on the bed next to Viktor, handing him one of the mugs. “Two spoons of jam, right?” he checked in a soft voice, and Viktor nodded, taking a sip of the perfectly made, comfortingly familiar tea.  Yuuri leaned against him and took a sip of his own tea, gaze soft without his glasses to sharpen it.

“Vitya, I’m sorry,” he said quietly after they had sat in silence for a little while. “I...  I should have realized exactly how much you were affected by what happened in Barcelona.” He set his tea to the side and cupped Viktor’s face with one warm hand.  “I love you.”

“I love you too,” Viktor whispered back, turning his face so he could press his lips to the ring on Yuuri’s finger, the ring that represented the promises they had made to each other.

Yuuri smiled and picked up his tea again, leaning against Viktor’s side and nosing at his shoulder before reaching out and taking his hand, their fingers naturally intertwining. Viktor took a sip of tea and stared down at their hands, smiling slightly at the way Yuuri’s ring glinted in the dim light.

Viktor would always worry, in his darkest moments, about Yuuri leaving him, just as he knew that Yuuri also worried sometimes about getting left behind.  But Viktor knew that he would always love Yuuri, that his love for his husband would always burn just as bright as Yuuri’s love did for him. And as he and Yuuri finished their tea before curling up in bed together, back in each other’s arms, Viktor was sure that his Yuuri knew it too.  As long as they were together like this, their love would last past any end. Snuggled up to Yuuri, Viktor’s breath slowed and evened out, and a calm sureness settling in his chest. Yuuri would be by his side come the next morning, and he would stay with him for every morning after that.

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you enjoyed! Feel free to comment/ask questions or talk to me [here](https://iwritebetterthanispeak.tumblr.com/), and have a wonderful day, dear reader!


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